Cobh 10 Mile 2024

10 Things I Think About The Cobh 10 Mile

1. The Great Wind Island

I think that the winner of the race today was the wind. The wind was a great wind, an unusual wind, it was very strong, it was big, it was consistent, and it brought no rain. I heard a lot of negative things being said about the wind, if I were the wind, I would be extremely upset at what was said about me out on the course.

2. Rest Day

I think that I will never again take a rest day before a race. I said I’d try it as everyone seems to think that tapering is great. The wind on Saturday made it easy to do no running as it was even windier than today. I ran no miles on Saturday even though there was nothing wrong with me which makes no sense to me. I expected to wake on Sunday morning feeling like a fella who drives a Tesla after two weeks of restful holidaying in Center Parcs. Instead the rest day did nothing, if anything I felt worse that normal, even the combination of coffee and beetroot shots didn’t work.

3. Never Judge a Startlist by its Contents

I think that it was scandalous altogether that all the better runners than me were allowed enter after the entries had closed at 1000 people. The published start list looked very promising for a potential top 4 finish, John Meade, Barry Twohig and Anthony Forristal seemed to be the likely 1,2,3 so I was hoping for my usual 4th place finish and a few bob. I was absolutely horrified to arrive at the start line and see numbers that went over 1000. What made it worse was that every person with a number over 1000 was a very good runner with far more talent than I have. It was very unfair on me.

4. The Fast Two Miles

I think that the hardest job today must have been pacing. On a calm day the Cobh 10 route would be hard to judge but with the great wind it must have been next to impossible, even an AI robot would have had difficulty calculating the splits required. The race went began with two miles with the great wind behind us. They were also downhill miles which made them very fast. The late entries group plus Anthony Forristal took off at a Sean Tobin course record breaking pace. I was left with the group that entered the race before the deadline. We went through two miles bang on 10 minutes which was about as good as the race got from a Strava bar graph point of view.

5. Alp Du Cobh

I think that the geography of Cobh is unusual. It is an extremely hilly island, very similar to Achill in that it has great wind and great climbs. After the first two miles the Strava bar chart took a steep drop, the beetroot juice stopped working, the wind started blowing and the road went up and up. The first hill before three miles is probably the worst on the course. It destroys average pace, destroys it and makes ones Strava look terrible. I just about got up it on in contact with Barry and John who climb like sherpas compared to my elephant like efforts.

6. Hatred Acid

I think that the combination of the great wind, the great hills and constantly being destroyed by John Meade and Barry every time the road titled upwards generated excessive hatred. On Youtube influencers use €400 lactic acid testers to test their lactate so they can put numbers they don’t understand on Strava and sell stuff to people with too much money. I think I might develop a similar hatred tester, a simple prick of the ear to test the blood for hatred. There is probably a hatred inflection point too where the hatred becomes too much for the body to process like happened to me today just after mile 5. I’m not sure what you would do with the data but sure everyone loves data.

7. Sports Psychologist

I think that the next big thing will be in race psychologist calls. It’s only a matter of time. I would definitely have paid money for someone to talk to me from mile 6 to mile 8. The wind, the straight road, the John Meade disappearing up the road with the other fella I don’t know wearing AlphaFlys. It was torture. I needed to phone a friend and have them talk to me and tell me I can do it. Instead I was swimming in a sea of hatred acid with a horrible wind pushing me further and further away from John Meade.

8. The Rugby Match

I think that the worst part of the great wind was the turn just after mile 8. It was cruel, like a trick. I ran down the steep hill full of hope thinking that once I turned the corner the great wind would blow me back to Cobh. Unfortunately the shape of the great island meant that the great wind was a full on headwind for that crucial ninth mile. When I rounded the corner it was like the wind turned into a giant second row rugby player and stood me up preventing any further forward progress. Then to make it worse Barry Twohig came flying by like he was running in a different climate.

9. The Final Straw

I think that the last mile of the race was wonderful. If all the other miles had been like mile 1, 2 and 10 we would have been fine and all broken the course record. The race organisers should make that happen next year, they could either turn the island around or run the course in the opposite direction. I would have been very fast on mile 10 too but just as I started it I came down with a case of exploding toe nail which meant that I couldn’t be bothered trying to chase Barry so I jogged home, I slowed down even more when I saw that we were miles outside the most important metric in 10 mile running, the 55 minute cut off for being included in John Walshe’s list of almost good runners.

10. The Last Leg Hurter

I think that the Cobh 10 is the only race left that is brave enough to leave in the hills. Even though I’m terrible at the hills I love the hills, especially mad Cobh hills. It’s like returning to the good old days of Ballycotton, with wind, hills, sunshine, sore legs and a nice race mug at the end. The atmosphere in the town at the end is worth suffering for, just maybe dial down the wind a little and close the entries just after I enter so that I can win or maybe come 4th, that would be perfect.

Mallow 10 2024

10 Things I Think About The Mallow 10 2024

1. Efficiency

I think that 10 miles has become the new 5k. There are a lot of 10 milers on now which is great as it is probably my favourite distance as it doesn’t disadvantage bigness as much as the marathon. Mallow has kind of become the unofficial Cork 10 mile championship. It has a championship race feel about it, very professional, good for ego boosting times and racing. Turn up, collect number, race, be happy with time on the clock and go home. Great.

2. Cold Rain

I think that we need to build more cycle paths and do what all the Eamon Ryan fearing people on Facebook are worried about and get out of our cars. The climate is in a bad way. Nearly every race this year has had at least two of the terrible running conditions, wind, cold or rain, some have had all three. Mallow went with the lesser combo of cold and rain. The wind was absent.

3. Beet It

I think that you know something works when people don’t tell you that they use it. Recently I have discovered beetroot shots. Viv uses them which is all you need to know. Initially I tried one, now I’m up to two an hour and a half before the race, I reckon I need two as I’m bigger with possibly double the volume of distribution of a Viv. I had to pull over in Kildorrey to take them as per the protocol. Use code BEETITVIV for 1.5% off your next purchase.

4. The Hardest Miles

I think that the best thing about the Mallow 10 route is that the first two miles are the hardest two miles. All you have to do is get through the first two miles and you’ve most of the work done. I made sure to get a good start as I knew the section in the grounds of the castle would be tricky with the rain and cold. I got to the gate with Peter Somba and Sean Doyle where sensibly I let them off to commence their games. I settled in with John Meade and Derek Griffin who I decided would be good sensible pacers. Viv was miles back as he had run 10 miles before hand to get ready for a marathon and probably hadn’t bothered with the Beet It.

5. The Treble

I think that the third mile of the race was my favourite. It was so good that I considered peeling off at the roundabout and going home as I had run such a good four miles. When we got to the top of the course at two miles and turned back onto the N20 where we are normally welcomed by a soul destroying wind we were instead met with a climate change induced tailwind which I used to first steam by Michael McMahon, followed by John Shine and then up to John Meade. I even briefly overtook John Meade which put me in 5th which I believe would be my rightful position if I trained properly. Due to his hatred of me John Meade put in a dig before the roundabout which established a gap which proved decisive in the all-important battle for 5th.

6. No Clowns

I think that it is a pity that there was no repeat of last year and the curious incident of Barry being called a Clown at the racecourse. There was no wind this year so there was no work to be done. Running behind someone was of no advantage so groups ran together without fighting. Just like last year I was with Michael McMahon as we passed the scene of the clown at the racecourse, so I friendly called him a clown so that the world was right.

7. Catch John Meade

I think that having someone to hate and chase in a race is worth more than any training. From mile four until the end I had John Meade to chase. Unfortunately my chasing was very poor and he got further and further away with the gap being filled by John Shine, Derek Griffin and a fella in a pair of luminous AlphaFly3s that I have never seen before. I was left in familiar company with Michael McMahon in a battle for 10th

8. Hydration Station

I think that the term hydration station is unnecessary alliteration (or is it assonance or consonance). There was a sign with hydration station written on it at mile 7 which made me even more angry that I already was. Why can’t it just be called water. Water is fine. I don’t think you need water anyway when it’s 8 degrees and raining. Derek Griffin must have been similarly annoyed as he also skipped the hydration station.

9. No Hills Martin

I think that you should never listen to what the people on the side of the road tell you about the course. The last two miles were a bit of a struggle, 10th became the best I could hope for, the only consolation was that Michael McMahon who less than a month ago was running 2:26 in Seville was suffering more. With about a mile and a half to go we passed Martin Leahy on the side of the road who stated with confidence that there were no more hills left and that it was all flat which was very untrue. There weren’t any mountains but that last mile is harder than flat especially when you have Michael McMahon on your back.

10. Machiavellian McMahon

I think that sitting on someone in an amateur road race for a mile and half before sprinting passed them on the line should result in a red card like in racewalking. It would have been great if a person from Mallow A.C had stepped out just before the line with a red card and disqualified Michael McMahon for disgraceful behaviour in taking my rightful 10th place. The only consolation is that I got under 55 minutes which will hopefully get me on John Walshe’s list of good 10-mile runners which is my main motivation for running 10-mile road races.