Cobh 10 Mile 2024

10 Things I Think About The Cobh 10 Mile

1. The Great Wind Island

I think that the winner of the race today was the wind. The wind was a great wind, an unusual wind, it was very strong, it was big, it was consistent, and it brought no rain. I heard a lot of negative things being said about the wind, if I were the wind, I would be extremely upset at what was said about me out on the course.

2. Rest Day

I think that I will never again take a rest day before a race. I said I’d try it as everyone seems to think that tapering is great. The wind on Saturday made it easy to do no running as it was even windier than today. I ran no miles on Saturday even though there was nothing wrong with me which makes no sense to me. I expected to wake on Sunday morning feeling like a fella who drives a Tesla after two weeks of restful holidaying in Center Parcs. Instead the rest day did nothing, if anything I felt worse that normal, even the combination of coffee and beetroot shots didn’t work.

3. Never Judge a Startlist by its Contents

I think that it was scandalous altogether that all the better runners than me were allowed enter after the entries had closed at 1000 people. The published start list looked very promising for a potential top 4 finish, John Meade, Barry Twohig and Anthony Forristal seemed to be the likely 1,2,3 so I was hoping for my usual 4th place finish and a few bob. I was absolutely horrified to arrive at the start line and see numbers that went over 1000. What made it worse was that every person with a number over 1000 was a very good runner with far more talent than I have. It was very unfair on me.

4. The Fast Two Miles

I think that the hardest job today must have been pacing. On a calm day the Cobh 10 route would be hard to judge but with the great wind it must have been next to impossible, even an AI robot would have had difficulty calculating the splits required. The race went began with two miles with the great wind behind us. They were also downhill miles which made them very fast. The late entries group plus Anthony Forristal took off at a Sean Tobin course record breaking pace. I was left with the group that entered the race before the deadline. We went through two miles bang on 10 minutes which was about as good as the race got from a Strava bar graph point of view.

5. Alp Du Cobh

I think that the geography of Cobh is unusual. It is an extremely hilly island, very similar to Achill in that it has great wind and great climbs. After the first two miles the Strava bar chart took a steep drop, the beetroot juice stopped working, the wind started blowing and the road went up and up. The first hill before three miles is probably the worst on the course. It destroys average pace, destroys it and makes ones Strava look terrible. I just about got up it on in contact with Barry and John who climb like sherpas compared to my elephant like efforts.

6. Hatred Acid

I think that the combination of the great wind, the great hills and constantly being destroyed by John Meade and Barry every time the road titled upwards generated excessive hatred. On Youtube influencers use €400 lactic acid testers to test their lactate so they can put numbers they don’t understand on Strava and sell stuff to people with too much money. I think I might develop a similar hatred tester, a simple prick of the ear to test the blood for hatred. There is probably a hatred inflection point too where the hatred becomes too much for the body to process like happened to me today just after mile 5. I’m not sure what you would do with the data but sure everyone loves data.

7. Sports Psychologist

I think that the next big thing will be in race psychologist calls. It’s only a matter of time. I would definitely have paid money for someone to talk to me from mile 6 to mile 8. The wind, the straight road, the John Meade disappearing up the road with the other fella I don’t know wearing AlphaFlys. It was torture. I needed to phone a friend and have them talk to me and tell me I can do it. Instead I was swimming in a sea of hatred acid with a horrible wind pushing me further and further away from John Meade.

8. The Rugby Match

I think that the worst part of the great wind was the turn just after mile 8. It was cruel, like a trick. I ran down the steep hill full of hope thinking that once I turned the corner the great wind would blow me back to Cobh. Unfortunately the shape of the great island meant that the great wind was a full on headwind for that crucial ninth mile. When I rounded the corner it was like the wind turned into a giant second row rugby player and stood me up preventing any further forward progress. Then to make it worse Barry Twohig came flying by like he was running in a different climate.

9. The Final Straw

I think that the last mile of the race was wonderful. If all the other miles had been like mile 1, 2 and 10 we would have been fine and all broken the course record. The race organisers should make that happen next year, they could either turn the island around or run the course in the opposite direction. I would have been very fast on mile 10 too but just as I started it I came down with a case of exploding toe nail which meant that I couldn’t be bothered trying to chase Barry so I jogged home, I slowed down even more when I saw that we were miles outside the most important metric in 10 mile running, the 55 minute cut off for being included in John Walshe’s list of almost good runners.

10. The Last Leg Hurter

I think that the Cobh 10 is the only race left that is brave enough to leave in the hills. Even though I’m terrible at the hills I love the hills, especially mad Cobh hills. It’s like returning to the good old days of Ballycotton, with wind, hills, sunshine, sore legs and a nice race mug at the end. The atmosphere in the town at the end is worth suffering for, just maybe dial down the wind a little and close the entries just after I enter so that I can win or maybe come 4th, that would be perfect.

Mallow 10 2024

10 Things I Think About The Mallow 10 2024

1. Efficiency

I think that 10 miles has become the new 5k. There are a lot of 10 milers on now which is great as it is probably my favourite distance as it doesn’t disadvantage bigness as much as the marathon. Mallow has kind of become the unofficial Cork 10 mile championship. It has a championship race feel about it, very professional, good for ego boosting times and racing. Turn up, collect number, race, be happy with time on the clock and go home. Great.

2. Cold Rain

I think that we need to build more cycle paths and do what all the Eamon Ryan fearing people on Facebook are worried about and get out of our cars. The climate is in a bad way. Nearly every race this year has had at least two of the terrible running conditions, wind, cold or rain, some have had all three. Mallow went with the lesser combo of cold and rain. The wind was absent.

3. Beet It

I think that you know something works when people don’t tell you that they use it. Recently I have discovered beetroot shots. Viv uses them which is all you need to know. Initially I tried one, now I’m up to two an hour and a half before the race, I reckon I need two as I’m bigger with possibly double the volume of distribution of a Viv. I had to pull over in Kildorrey to take them as per the protocol. Use code BEETITVIV for 1.5% off your next purchase.

4. The Hardest Miles

I think that the best thing about the Mallow 10 route is that the first two miles are the hardest two miles. All you have to do is get through the first two miles and you’ve most of the work done. I made sure to get a good start as I knew the section in the grounds of the castle would be tricky with the rain and cold. I got to the gate with Peter Somba and Sean Doyle where sensibly I let them off to commence their games. I settled in with John Meade and Derek Griffin who I decided would be good sensible pacers. Viv was miles back as he had run 10 miles before hand to get ready for a marathon and probably hadn’t bothered with the Beet It.

5. The Treble

I think that the third mile of the race was my favourite. It was so good that I considered peeling off at the roundabout and going home as I had run such a good four miles. When we got to the top of the course at two miles and turned back onto the N20 where we are normally welcomed by a soul destroying wind we were instead met with a climate change induced tailwind which I used to first steam by Michael McMahon, followed by John Shine and then up to John Meade. I even briefly overtook John Meade which put me in 5th which I believe would be my rightful position if I trained properly. Due to his hatred of me John Meade put in a dig before the roundabout which established a gap which proved decisive in the all-important battle for 5th.

6. No Clowns

I think that it is a pity that there was no repeat of last year and the curious incident of Barry being called a Clown at the racecourse. There was no wind this year so there was no work to be done. Running behind someone was of no advantage so groups ran together without fighting. Just like last year I was with Michael McMahon as we passed the scene of the clown at the racecourse, so I friendly called him a clown so that the world was right.

7. Catch John Meade

I think that having someone to hate and chase in a race is worth more than any training. From mile four until the end I had John Meade to chase. Unfortunately my chasing was very poor and he got further and further away with the gap being filled by John Shine, Derek Griffin and a fella in a pair of luminous AlphaFly3s that I have never seen before. I was left in familiar company with Michael McMahon in a battle for 10th

8. Hydration Station

I think that the term hydration station is unnecessary alliteration (or is it assonance or consonance). There was a sign with hydration station written on it at mile 7 which made me even more angry that I already was. Why can’t it just be called water. Water is fine. I don’t think you need water anyway when it’s 8 degrees and raining. Derek Griffin must have been similarly annoyed as he also skipped the hydration station.

9. No Hills Martin

I think that you should never listen to what the people on the side of the road tell you about the course. The last two miles were a bit of a struggle, 10th became the best I could hope for, the only consolation was that Michael McMahon who less than a month ago was running 2:26 in Seville was suffering more. With about a mile and a half to go we passed Martin Leahy on the side of the road who stated with confidence that there were no more hills left and that it was all flat which was very untrue. There weren’t any mountains but that last mile is harder than flat especially when you have Michael McMahon on your back.

10. Machiavellian McMahon

I think that sitting on someone in an amateur road race for a mile and half before sprinting passed them on the line should result in a red card like in racewalking. It would have been great if a person from Mallow A.C had stepped out just before the line with a red card and disqualified Michael McMahon for disgraceful behaviour in taking my rightful 10th place. The only consolation is that I got under 55 minutes which will hopefully get me on John Walshe’s list of good 10-mile runners which is my main motivation for running 10-mile road races.

Kinsale 10 Mile 2024

10 Things I Think About The Kinsale 10 Mile 2024

1. Momentum

I think that once you have conquered a terrible running injury it is best to get back to frequent racing as soon as possible so as to prove to the injury that you have fully defeated it. After the victorious return to racing in Doneraile I decided to do Kinsale mainly because I couldn’t face doing a session and Rhona was doing it so I’d be down there anyway. It was sold out but being regarded has having moderate running ability I was able to get a late entry by sending an email and providing some money.

2. Seagulls

I think animals know the weather better than any Windy.com or Met Eireann forecast. All you needed to know about the weather in Kinsale on Sunday was that the seagulls sheltering from the bitterly cold wind and rain had their heads tucked into their wings. Sensible seagulls.

3. Saile

I think that we were very lucky with parking, parking on a day like Sunday was crucial. I had driven down the night before so I knew that parking was at the GAA club which was far enough from the start to result in a significant decrease in body temperature both before and after the race. Luckily when we got to the roundabout before the school the poor misfortunate Garda on traffic duty told us there were spaces at Saile about 500m from the startline. Not only were there spaces but there were toilets with no queues and you could park outside the door which minimized how cold you got before the start.

4. Inappropriate Clothing

I think that the old saying there’s no such thing as inappropriate weather is incorrect. There was no clothing suitable for Kinsale. It was too cold and wet and windy and flooded for any clothes or shoe combination. They don’t make magic shoes in GoreTex and you’d have been blown away if you wore a jacket so the only thing to do was wear a long sleeve under a singlet and then put arm warmers over the long sleeve. This worked quite well and I was only moderately cold when I left the car eight minutes before the start.

5. One Way to Warm Up

I think that the only way to warm up on a day like Sunday in Kinsale is to go out hard for the first mile. I haven’t executed perfect training or performed any training blocks in nearly four months so this was a questionable strategy but I got nice and warm and it probably frightened Viv and Mark Walsh who have been training perfectly.

6. Viv

I think that it is great to be back in races tormenting Viv. It took a mile for Mark Walsh to drop me which was further than I had expected to get, then I was caught by Viv and Kris. The first five miles are uphill so Viv had opened a small but significant gap by the time we reached the top of the mountain. I knew that Viv’s efforts would be pointless and on the first big downhill I swept by in about 10 monster strides destroying his hard earned gap. “Weight is great” I said as I passed which made him very angry. I knew I had no hope of beating him so I was just happy to be able to be tormenting him five miles into the race.

7. Asics Frontrunner

I think that it is a great pity that I am not an Asics Frontrunner. John Meade would also love to be an Asics Frontrunner so he alerts me to the application process every year. We both apply and both get rejected without fail, I think I’m getting an auto reply at this stage. I can’t understand why, I have a blog, do lots of races and have a full head of hair which would be useful for selling shoes. This year I also applied to Saysky who have a similar program to the Asics also on the advice of John Meade and again was rejected. Kris on the other hand appears to have been selected by Saysky as he was decked out from head to toe in very nice Danish gear which was probably especially designed for Kinsale conditions.

8. Negative Truth

I think that one of the main problems with running is the amount of negativity that surrounds running. You’d be better off to have never met another runner or person involved in running and know absolutely nothing about what supposedly is correct or true or wrong. As I got further and further into the race all I kept thinking was “you’ve no training done”, “you shouldn’t be able to race 10 miles”, “you are an idiot”, “you are going to get injured again” etc, etc. While this is all to some extent true, most of the time you are better off not knowing the truth and just running by what you feel which is the most important truth.

9. Equalization Algorithms

I think that running has a fundamental problem when it comes to weather. Running is a silly sport obsessed with one measurable parameter, time, independent of everything else. It is mad that a race run on a flat course in perfect weather will always be seen as better than a race run on a hilly course in a storm. For the Olympic marathon it is 2:08 to qualify regardless of course or conditions which is silly because 2:08 in Valencia or Seville is not 2:08 in Kinsale or Reykjavik or some other windy cold wet place. So what are we to do? Do we all just accept that all races should be in Spain in winter? Or do we come up with some method of assessing performances. Anyway, my main point is my time in Kinsale was better than it looks.

10. Finish Line is at the Car

I think that the finish of the race in Kinsale is very nice, it is well executed with the nice track so that Viv can extend his lead over you to 10 seconds in 200m. The only problem this year was the weather which meant that once you crossed the line you had to keep going or you would die of the cold. I said well done to Viv and Kris who had collected the last of the prizes and jogged back to the car where I got changed and put on two coats which was just about enough. I kind of enjoyed it. I’ll come back next year to win a prize.

Galbally 10 Mile 2021

10 Things I Think About the Galbally 10 Mile 2021

1. DNA

I think that if I did a DNA test and they could test for Galbally they’d find a fair amount of Galbally in my blood. When I actually did the DNA test the report didn’t mention Galbally but it did report 0.5% Sardinian. Sardinian hertiage is much better than Galbally although both are very beautiful in the sunshine.

2. Running Disease

I think that there is a terrible disease circulating amongst local runners. It is a terrible disease with no known cure and definitely no vaccine. It is called the Marathon. It primarily affects the brain and causes athletes to do silly things like long warm-ups and makes them avoid the stuff they should be doing like cross country and track. Some of them even go so mad as to avoid all other races other than marathons.

3. Earliness

I think it is amazing how early people are for things. I was abnormally early for the race because of the marathon disease which meant that my brain thought it would be a good idea to do 8 miles before the race. The race didn’t start until 11 yet people were arriving at 9.30. I’ve never understood earliness, it is much more fun to cut it tight and to be desperately trying to pin a number onto a singlet 5 minutes before the start, it gets the adrenaline going better.

4. Abbey

I think that the start of the race was beautiful. It was actually in Tipperary as it was across the river just after the abbey and all the Limerick flags. I don’t know anything about the abbey but I presume there were monks in it ages ago when people didn’t do races.

5. Next%2

I think that the Next%2 is not as good as the original Next%. It is definitely less magic than the original Next%. The sizing was so different I had to get a UK12 instead of a UK13 in the original. It feels like they made the foam less boucy/magic and the laces are the worst laces ever made. I might have to try the AlphaFlys as I no longer feel like I am cheating. A fella passed me in them today and it reminded me of when I first saw magic shoes. It could also be that my brain has normalised the bounciness.

6. Trip to Tipp

I think that I know the road between Galbally and Tipperary too well. I never ran it or cycled it before because you’d normally be killed but it was perfectly safe in the race. I don’t know how the organizers made it so safe but they did a great job.

7. More Hills Please

I think that flat road races should be illegal, if you want to run a flat course put on a pair of spikes and head to the track. Course records need to become a thing, not every race can be a flat boring breaking 2 science experiment so that everyone can go on Facebook afterwards and tell everyone about their PB. This was a proper course for proper runners.

8. Ice Towel

I think that people are too quick to tell me to cut my hair. It is actually a wonderful thing to have a mane in a hot race where they are giving out cold water. Normally when you have short hair like everyone else the water goes down your back into your shoes which is horrible. With a thick mane the cold water is retained cooling your head and neck. It’s a wonderful feeling.

9. Weeeeee

I think that the best part of this course is the last mile. It really is wonderful. It’s very very fast and very beautiful with the Galtees on your right. I was amazed at how fast I was able to run the last mile considering how bad I felt. It must be very downhill.

10. Mugs

I think that mugs are about the only thing that is a useful memento from a race. Mugs are great as unlike T-shirts it’s hard to make a bad mug, the Galbally mug was a good mug. I’d love to do this race again once I have recovered from the marathon disease. It’s a proper race.