Berlin

10 Things I Think about Berlin

1. Hipsters

Berlin is probably the hipster capital of the world, beards and coffee shops everywhere. Even the Russian taxi driver understood what a hipster was.

Eh...vot es hipster?

You know, beards and coffee.

Eh Yes heepsters.

2. Brunch

Flamingo Fresh Food down by the Bahnhof is the best place for breakfast, brunch or lunch. For some unknown reason German lunch starts at 11am so you need to get there early for breakfast. It has a never ending moving queue full of hipsters and business people but it's worth the wait. Great sandwiches and soup. Perfect coffee. Mohnkuchen is a very nice cake.

3. City Walks

City walks are a great way to see a city. A four hour tour of East Berlin sounds like it's too much but it flies by. Phil the Irish tour guide from Dublin was brilliant, you learn all sorts of things like why Hitler built the Berlin Wall.

4. Howard

Howard is a legend. He was manning the exit barriers from the half marathon. A very big man from Accra in Ghana. He started giving out to me for not speaking German while I was waiting for Conor to return the timing chip. He informed us that he had gotten up at 1am to drive from Bremen to earn some extra money to fund his Kenny G habit. His wife was not very happy about this, "Man someday I won't be here, it's very important to enjoy your life." "I love jazz especially Kenny G, but my wife, she ask, why you spend all your money on Kenny G".

5. Post Half Marathon Party

The main lesson I learned from the weekend is that the official post half marathon party is not as boring as you'd think. I always thought it would be a waste of time. Very wrong. It was on in the Puro-Sky Lounge. I even got a selfie with Masai, the winner of the men's race. Lots of dancing, however a disappointing absence of techno music. A fun game to play is where do you think I'm from, apparently I'm from Czech Republic.

6. Russian Bouncers

Russian Bouncers are possibly the scariest people on earth. The bouncer for the Puro-Sky Lounge was a 6'10 Russian. We dared to enter with our jackets on.

"You vill put zour jackets in"

"Yes, yes we will"

It could have been €50, you'd have put your jacket in, thankfully it was only €1.

7. Beer

Beer in Berlin is like ham in Spain, it's fantastic and there are lots of varieties. The Beer section in every shop is the same size as the ham section in Spain. It's fantastically cheap, they even do nice non-alcoholic versions and won't think you're ill if you ask for one. These are best consumed immediately after running, just like ham.

8. Hackenthals

An absolute gem of a German restaurant. 16th on trip advisor in Berlin. They had their own beer, a dunkel which tasted like a sweet Guinness, it was lovely. The ghoulash and apple strudel was incredible, I don't think there's much better. Very good value, free Polish vodka if it's your birthday, just don't mention Brexit to the Dundeers sitting next to you.

9. Not Spain

Everything works in Berlin, you won't wait pointlessly in a supermarket queue. You won't wait long for a U-bahn. It's definitely not like Spain. Although if you walk down the street in a Real Betis jersey people will shout "Betis, Betis" at you. Secretly I think they'd like to be Spanish, it's more fun.

10. €55

It will cost you €55 for a haircut in Berlin, it will be a very nice haircut and take almost two hours. They will wash your hair and spin you around in the chair randomly. They will only cut the sides. Kenny G will be playing in the background. Howard would approve.