10 Things I Think About Running

10 Things I Think About The GNI Cork BHAA 5k

1. Ryanair

I think that it is amazing what a free long sleeve t-shirt will do for race numbers. David McWilliams could do a podcast on the economics of the Cork BHAA. 750 people paying €5 makes more money than a race with 200 people charging €15. Assuming a lot of the costs are fixed then maybe there is room for a Ryanair in road races, so long as they can find a source for cheap long sleeve t-shirts that look fabulous.

2. Breakfast Cereal Box

I think that my favourite thing about the race last night was the race number. I was a little late registering for the race in order to guarantee that I didn’t get another race t-shirt to add to the mountain that I have collected over the years. Owing to the popularity of the long sleeve t-shirt the numbers with chips had run out so I was given my number handwritten on a piece of thick cardboard jaggedly torn from possibly a breakfast cereal box. It was quite difficult to get the safety pins through the cardboard but once installed it was far more comfortable and less annoying than the huge numbers with the chips on them.

3. Very Rare

I think that you know you have great fashion sense when people start to copy you. Pat O’Connor turned up for the race in exactly the same outfit, red singlet, blue shorts, pink and yellow Vaporfly 3s and Garmin watch. It is very rare to see this level of excellent fashion sense, normally only high-level influencers like myself can select such an excellent combination of colours.

4. Get Back

I think that there was a little difficulty with getting everyone behind the startline because of the popularity of the long sleeve t-shirt. It’s very difficult to move a large crowd of people backwards, I think you have to start at the back as there is no point telling the people at the front to move back as they’ve nowhere to go and the people at the back can’t hear you shouting at the people at the front. We could have asked Lizzie Lee to project manage the movement of people back behind the line, I’m certain this would have worked. Technically the first five rows of the race should be disqualified but sure it’s only a road race and when your race number is a piece of a cardboard box there’s no point in getting upset about small details.

5. Stay Upright

I think that people are too worried about getting out fast at the start of a 5k. The start of a 5k is definitely the least important part of the race. There is no need for the mad sprint off the line, it’s a very long race. My main concern for the first 100m was staying upright which was surprisingly easy once I navigated my way around Lizzie. Then I saw Viv and John Meade up ahead so I aimed for them.

6. Patience

I think that the most important thing in a 5k is to be patient during the first mile. After about 800m I found myself at the back of a nice group containing Viv, John Meade, Barry Twohig and Aidan. Viv was at the front which made him very uncomfortable, he kept looking around like as if there was something inherently wrong with him having to run into the wind. I stayed right at the back of the group entertained by Viv running while looking behind himself and patiently waited for us to reach the roundabout when the wind would be at our backs.

7. Perfection

I think that you couldn’t have created better conditions for a 5k if you had a magical weather machine. It was perfect a cross headwind for the first mile which was almost fully sheltered followed by two miles with the wind at your back. Even the temperatures were perfect. Once we reached the roundabout I took command of the Viv group and went at my absolute maximum top speed of 5:00 minutes per mile.

8. Merciless Meade

I think that John Meade’s performances have become very inconsistent. I am now 100% guaranteed to beat him 50% of the time. Unfortunately, a 5k down the Marina is where John Meade is at his best. When we turned left at the Marquee John Meade appeared on my left shoulder looking like real John Meade. I made one last attempt to keep him behind on the slight incline back to the Marina but as we rounded the right-hand potholed corner for the extremely long run for home he flew past with Viv on his back.

9. D’une Autre Planete

I think that if L’Equipe covered Cork BHAA races then the front page would have a picture of Viv rather than poor Jonas Vingegaard. Anyone who has watched Viv in action knows how impressive a sight it is to see him in full flow at the end of a race. What he did in the last 800m of this race was other worldly, he glided by John Meade, dispatched the Canadian Kerryman, before silently sailing by Tom McKenzie all in an effortless two minutes.

10. Great PB by Me*

I think that despite the terrible defeat by both Viv and John Meade it was possibly a great PB by me. I’m unsure if it is my fastest time over the distance of approximately 5K but as any good influencer knows it’s not what you’ve actually done, it’s what people think you have done, that’s what’s important. Influencers make their own PBs, anyway I prefer to focus on beating people and on that front it was definitely not a PB.